Departure of legends

Jedna od poslednjih vesti koja se raširila svetom me je jako potresla i uznemirila i zato sam odlučila da na blogu napišem nešto sasvim drugačije. Verujte mi da se davim u suzama spremajući ovo jer mi nije lako da pričam o ovakvim stvarima, a osećam da moram da kažem nekoliko reči. U toku ove godine, koja traje svega nepunih pet meseci, izgubili smo toliko velikih i uticajnih ljudi da mi ne preostaje ništa drugo nego da se pitam šta smo to dragom Bogu, ili bilo kome zgrešili da se zauvek opraštamo od ljudi koji su nam bili uzori.

1. David Bowie (rođen 8. januara 1947., umro 10. januara 2016.): David Robert Jones, Jareth kralj goblina, Ziggy Stardust, zovite ga kako hoćete, sve te ličnosti su bile isti čovek. Sve u vezi s njim je bilo nesvakidašnje, od očiju različitih boja do šminke i kostima za koje niko ne bi pomislio da će ih nositi muškarac. Divila sam mu se od malena, ne toliko zbog muzike jer sam je slabo poznavala, već zbog toga što sam ga poistovećivala sa onim što me je činilo srećnom: boje, moda, zvuci, ludilo. Svoj život van scene je krio neverovatno dobro za umetnika svog kalibra, toliko da je njegova smrt za čitav svet bila najpre šok i neverica, a tek onda kada se vest slegla, bezbojna praznina. Niko nije ni slutio da pati od teške bolesti, samo što je najavio novi album i objavio dva nova spota, činilo se da je sve u redu, a onda naprasno saznajemo da više nije među nama, i svet je odjednom postao nesrećno, nemo i bezbojno mesto. Bio mi je čudan, neobičan, ali nikako odbojan, naprotiv. U njemu sam videla nešto zanimljivo, puno energije i boja, toliko drugačije od sveta u kome živim, ali opet prihvaćeno širokih ruku. Iz trenutaka u kojima sam se osećala manje vredno i da ne pripadam ovde vadila me je upravo ta pojava, njegova persona. Veliki podstrek da živim onako kako želim bila mi je misao: "On je drugačiji, inovator a ne imitator. Ako je on odabrao da ne odustaje od svojih vizija i snova, zašto ne bih ja?"

2. Alan Rickman (rođen 21. februara 1946., umro 14. januara 2016.): Ljudi koji vole Harry Potter franšizu kao ja zavoleli su ga kao profesora Severusa Snapea, ali je kao glumac imao mnogo lica u brojnim filmovima. Sećam se kako je dao dimenziju profesoru Snapeu, kao devojčici mi je bio gnusan, ali kako sam rasla videla sam sve slojeve njegove genijalne glume i sposobnost da u meni probudi i sreću, i bes, i tugu, nešto što malo ko može. Gledajući ga u toj ulozi naučila sam da nikada ne sudim o ljudima na osnovu prvog utiska jer ne možeš nikoga tako lako upoznati. Kao što ni vi niste sasvim na izvol'te, nisu ni drugi ljudi, i sve dok nekoga bolje ne upoznate ne možete znati da li je on zaista srećan, da li pati, zašto ćutljiv sedi u uglu umesto da brblja u većem društvu ili naizgled krije nešto iza osmeha koji ne deluje sasvim iskreno. Hoću li ga se sećati kao nekog ko me je inspirisao da budem bolja prema ljudima? Uvek.

3. Kōji Wada (rođen 29. januara 1974., umro 3. aprila 2016.): Ne znam koliko je on značio svetu i drugima, ali ovaj čovek je meni ulepšao detinjstvo. Kad me neko pita šta me je kao dete najviše radovalo, prvo čega se setim su Digimoni i pesma koju je snimio kao uvodnu špicu za dotičnu animiranu seriju. Pored toga što sam uz Digimone počela da razumem hrabrost, ljubav, prijateljstvo, mudorst, iskrenost, poštenje, nadu, svetlost, život i smrt, uz njegovu pesmu sam uvek igrala ispred televizora. Štaviše, to je bila prva pesma koju sam naučila da pevam od početka do kraja iako je bila na japanskom i nisam je razumela. I dan-danas znam da je pevam od reči do reči, i najzad razumem svaku. Još uvek se rasplačem kad je čujem i ne usuđujem se da je pevam, pogotovo od njegove smrti jer znam da bih verovatno plakala satima. Uz njega sam shvatila da nije bitno kojim jezikom govorimo sve dok njime propovedamo ljubav, mir i sve za šta se vredi boriti, a i da se ne razumeva mozgom i ušima, već srcem.

4. Prince (rođen 7. juna 1958., umro 21. aprila 2016.): Neću govoriti kako sam obožavala njegovu muziku jer to ne bi bilo pošteno prema onima koji to sa pravom mogu da tvrde, nisam je slušala i nisam bila upoznata sa njom. Znate li kada sam prvi put čula njegov hit Purple Rain? Jutros. Da, tako je, tek jedan dan pošto je svetu saopšteno da je preminuo. Njegova pojava i uticaj na modu su me uvek fascinirali, neretko bih se zbunjeno češala po glavi mozgajući šta je koji đavo hteo da kaže sijajući kao disko kugla i noseći štikle, ali za svu hrabrost i samopouzdanje koje bi pokazao na sceni ili pred foto-aparatom bila sam spremna da ustanem i uputim mu aplauz koji nikada neće čuti. Bila sam dirnuta kada sam pročitala da je imao tu sreću da naiđe na svoju muzu, ljubav svog života, ali i tu tragediju da sa njom dobije sina koji je umro svega nedelju dana nakon rođenja. Nisam plakala sve dok nisam pročitala izjavu njegove bivše supruge (gorepomenute), kada sam videla da je rekla: "Sada je na nebu sa našim sinom." to me je slomilo. Nadam se da je, gde god da je sada, povratio tu sreću koju je ovde izgubio.

Svet je uvek tužan kada nas napusti neko ovako veliki, ali pored njih svakoga dana umiru i oni ljudi za koje niko ne zna - nečije dete, roditelj, brat ili sestra, prijatelj. Jednoga dana to može biti i neko vaš, vaša lična legenda, vaš lični heroj. Zato vam savetujem samo jedno što ću i sama primenjivati: volite svoje najbliže celim svojim bićem, postarajte se da osete vašu ljubav svaki dan jer se nikada ne zna kada će biti poslednji put, a kajaćete se ako pomislite da ste propuštali svoje prilike. Jeste da će oni koje volite živeti sve dok je vas, ali cenite vreme koje delite sa njima jer niko nije veći od života.

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One of the last news that spread across the world really shook and disturbed me and that's why I decided to write something completely different on this blog. Believe me that I'm drowning in my own tears as I'm writing this because it's not easy for me to speak of these things, and yet I feel the need to say a word or two. During this year that only lasted for less than five months so far we lost so many great and influential people that there's nothing left for me to do other than ask myself what we have done to dear God, or anyone else, to deserve this pain of having to say goodbye to people who were our role models.

1. David Bowie (born on 8th of January 1947, died on 10th of January 2016): David Robert Jones, Jareth the goblin king, Ziggy Stardust, call him what you want, all those personalities were the same man. Everything about him was extraordinary, from differently colored eyes to his make up and costumes that no one would ever think a man could, or would wear. I admired him ever since I was little, not so much for his music because I didn't know it so well, but because I related him to the things that made me happy: colors, fashion, sounds, craziness. He was hiding his private life incredibly well for such an admired artist, so well that his death was initially shocking and unbelievable to the world, and later when the news settled, a colorless void. No one would ever think that he was suffering from a deadly illness, he had just announced his latest album and released two brand new videos, everything seemed fine, and then we simply heard that he's no longer with us, and the world became an unhappy, silent and colorless place. He was strange and unusual to me, but never repulsive, on the contrary. I saw something interesting in him, packed with energy and colors, something so different from the world I lived in, and yet welcomed with open arms. His appearance and persona would always pull me out of the moments when I felt worthless and undeserving of my place in the world. The thought that made me be brave to live my life my way was this one: "He's different, an innovator, not an imitator. If he chose to never give up on his visions and dreams, why shouldn't I?"

2. Alan Rickman (born on 21st of February 1946, died on 14th of January 2016): People who love the Harry Potter franchise as much as I do loved him as professor Severus Snape, but as an actor he had so many faces in numerous movies. I remember how he gave dimension to professor Snape, as a little girl I thought he was despicable, but as I grew I began to see all the layers of his genius acting and ability to make me feel happy, angry, sad, something that not everyone can do. Watching him in that role taught me to never judge people based on the first impression because you can never know someone well that easily. Just like you're not exactly an open book, other people aren't either, and until you get to know them better you can't tell if they're really happy, if they're suffering, why they're quietly standing in the corner instead of babbling in company or if they seem to be hiding something underneath the not so believable smile. Will I remember him as someone who inspired me to be better to people? Always.

3. Kōji Wada (born on 29th of January 1974, died on 3rd of April 2016): I don't know how much he meant to the world and other people, but this man made my childhood amazing. When someone asks me what made me the happiest as a child, the first thing I remember are Digimon and the song he recorded as an intro to the animated series. Not only did Digimon teach me to understand courage, love, friendship, wisdom, sincerity, honesty, hope, light, life and death, his song would always make me dance in front of the TV. As a matter of fact, it was the first song I ever learned to sing from beginning to end even though it was in Japanese and I didn't understand a word of it. Even today I still know to sing it from the first to the last word, and I finally understand them all. I still cry when I hear it and I don't dare to sing it, especially since he died because I know that I'll be crying for hours. He made me realize that it doesn't matter what language we speak in as long as we preach love, peace and everything worth fighting for, and that one does not understand with their brain or ears, but with their heart. 

4. Prince (born on 7th of June 1958, died on 21st of April 2016): I won't say how I adored his music because it would be unfair to those who can rightfully claim it, I didn't listen to it and I didn't know anything about it. Do you know when I first heard his hit song Purple Rain? This morning. Yep, that's right, just the day after the world was told that he had passed away. His appearance and influence on fashion have always fascinated me, I would often scratch my head in confusion and wonder what the heck he wanted to say by looking like a disco ball and wearing high heels, but for all the courage and confidence he would show on stage or in front of the camera I was ready to stand up and give him a round of applause that he'd never hear. I was touched when I read that he was lucky enough to find his muse, the love of his life, but also suffered the tragedy of having a son who had died just a week after birth with her. I didn't cry until I read his ex-wife's (previously mentioned) statement, when I saw that she said: "Now he's in heaven with our son." it broke me. I hope that he, wherever he might be, reclaimed the happiness that he had lost here.

The world is always sad when such a great person leaves us, but aside from them people that nobody knows of die every day - someone's child, parent, brother or sister, friend. One day it could be someone yours, your personal legend, your personal hero. That's why I only advise you one thing, that I'm also going to stick to: love your closest ones with all of your heart, make sure they feel your love every day because you never know which time will be the last, and you'll regret if you think that you missed out on your chances. Surely the ones you love will live on for as long as you exist, but appreciate the time you share with them, for no one is larger than life.